you are doomed

I am screwed.
I am lost.
It's over.

The worst thing about the adulthood is that we cannot just walk away.

I mean, we can, but that'll be very irresponsible, harmful (to others) and, well, rude.

So considering those who will be affected by my quitting or giving up, despite my accumulating and apparent incompetence, I cannot just 'get up and leave.'

The new plan must now be my way out. A way out with some dignity, and a job.

How is it possible that at the age of 45, I still don't know what I want? And all I do is complain? to the point that I alienate some of my most previous friends? I have turned into a whinny middle-age lady stuck in the middle management with self-inflicted calamities. Both at work and at home.

But all of it, literally all of it, can be classified as a first-world problem. IOW, I have nothing to complain, really.